A Reminder

I'm trying to be like Jesus
I'm following in His ways
I trying to love as He did
In all that I do and say.
At times I am tempted
to make a wrong choice
But I try to listen
as the still small voice whispers
Love one another as Jesus loves you
Try to show kindness in all that you do
Be gentle and loving in deed and in thought
For these are the things Jesus taught.

I'm trying to love my neighbor
I'm learning to serve my friends
I watch for the day of gladness
When Jesus will come again
I try to remember
the lessons He taught
Then the Holy Spirit
enters into my thoughts saying
Love one another as Jesus loves you
Try to show kindness in all that you do
Be gentle and loving in deed and in thought
For these are the things Jesus taught.

SSP

I work in financial services, not financial aid, just for clarification. Everybody gets the two confused, and while I get tired of explaining the difference, I can understand their misunderstanding. We really like to make things difficult in the administration. Anyhow, because they confuse us, I've learned a lot about financial aid over the years. One thing I do know is about SAP. That's Satisfactory Academic Progress. You have to pass at least 70% of you classes each semester to qualify for federal aid; if you fail or drop too many classes, no money for you.

I said something at work the other day; it was just a passing comment to one of my coworkers, but the fact that it slipped from my lips so easily and naturally bothers me even more. I've felt really bad about it, and it's made me re-evaluate my attitudes about a lot of things. Sometimes I feel like I'm struggling with SSP (that's Satisfactory Spiritual Progress (see, the first paragraph does sort of apply)) or my lack thereof. I don't believe the Lord holds up some sort of "Celestial measuring-stick" to see if we "qualify" for heavenly aid, but I feel like he probably requires some sort of satisfactory change in our lives. That's what true repentance is - a permanent change of heart. So if I'm not really changing my attitude, I can go through all the motions perfectly, but it doesn't matter.

See, in financial aid, you can keep your money just for going to class. If you fail one semester, they may not give you more money for the next term, but if you prove you attended classes and took the final, you get to keep the money they already gave you (as opposed to charging you back if you don't attend). But the Lord's measures are of course different. "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord." He requires more. In order to meet SSP, we have to let go of past transgressions, change our hearts, purify our thoughts, keep His commandments, and then rely on His grace to make us clean. There is no 'good enough'; "no unclean thing can dwell with God." I shouldn't really call it Satisfactory spiritual progress.

Mosiah commanded men to "[yield] to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, and [put] off the natural man and [become] a saint through the atonement of Christ the Lord." Perhaps I need to step back and rededicate myself to this task. I'm going along, seeing that I have been improving, changing, and indeed I have. On a 70% pass rule, I may not be perfect, but perhaps I have achieved SSP. But that's not good enough. SSP isn't what I want; it's not how I measure my life. It's time I refocused myself to putting of my natural doubts and fears and start trusting a little more in my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. Through Him, through His infinite atoning sacrifice, I become a saint.

And really, with the prospects of Eternal Life ahead of me, the enticings of SSP pale in comparison. Exaltation is my aim, and it is just going to require a little more effort, a little more dedication, and a lot more faith and trust.

Thanks, Friends

That (meaning the previous post) said, I must say to so many of you, that you have truly affected my life for the better. Perhaps had I not met you, I would have met someone else who could teach me much, if I let them, but the simple fact is, I met you. You each touched me in a way that only you could. And that has made all the difference.

To you who are my friends, I say, Thank You. You have taught me how to love, and you have shown me how I can be loved. You gave me hope in those moments when I thought there could be none found anywhere. It is because of you that I can say I have learned to live life with enthusiasm. I've heard it said that a friend is someone who knows the song in your heart and sings it back to you when you have forgotten the tune. You make a lovely chorus. Thanks, friends.

I can't begin to thank each of you personally, and this public forum is hardly the place I would do it if I could. But if you are a true friend, you know who you are. Whatever I may say about my life's choices, know that I have never for a moment regretted knowing you. Because I knew you, I have become a better person. You have helped me along the way to my eternal goal. Sister Lucy Mack Smith said, "We must cherish one another, watch over one another, comfort one another and gain instruction that we may all sit down in heaven together." I look forward to the day that we can all sit down in heaven together. Thanks, friends.

All the Difference

"I've heard it said that people come into our lives for a reason, bringing something we must learn, and we are led to those who help us most to grow if we let them, and we help them in return. Well I don't know if I believe that's true, but I know I'm who I am today because I knew you...So much of me is made of what I learned from you; you'll be with me, like a handprint on my heart. And now whatever way our stories end, know you have rewritten mine by being my friend...Like a commet pulled from orbit as it passes a sun, like a stream that meets a boulder, halfway through the wood, who can say if I've been changed for the better, but because I knew you, I have been changed for good." (From the Broadway musical, Wicked)

This post is about attitudes. So many people teach that we are who we are because of our circumstances. I don't believe it. Robert Frost wrote:

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
OhI kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diveged in a wood, and I--
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
(The Road Not Taken)

We make choices, each of us, that determine the path we will walk in this life. For some choices, there is a right and a wrong. To choose something that is contrary to the commandments of God would be wrong, whatever that choice entails. (For example, while there may not be a specific occupation that is right, to earn one's living through immoral or unethical means would be wrong. Similarly, whether or not to attend a certain party tonight may not be of eternal consequence unless it involves actions prohibited by the Lord.) Still, as Elder Oaks has taught, "The Final Judgment is not just an evaluation of a sum total of good and evil acts--what we have done. It is an acknowledgement of the final effect of our acts and thoughts--what we have become.” (“The Challenge to Become,” Liahona, Jan. 2001, 40)

Our choices lead us down paths (which way leads on to way, such that we seldom return); the paths we choose today do "make all the difference", but whether that difference is a positive or negative one is up to us. I decide what I will become! A scriptural example from Alma 62:41:
"But behold, because of the exceedingly great length of the war between the Nephites and the Lamanites many had become hardened, because of the exceedingly great length of the war; and many were softened becasued of their afflictions, insomuch that they did humble themselves before God, even in the depth of humility." When I discovered this scripture some years ago, I wrote in the margin, "The trial itself is of little intrinsic value -> our ATTITUDE spurs growth" and cross-referenced Alma 32:14, which reads, "And now, as I said unto you that because ye were compelled to be humble ye were blessed, do ye not suppose that they are more blessed who truly humble themselves because of the word?"

I must admit, I have never appreciated being compelled to be humble. I'll admit, life is tough. And making the most of the experience we have here in mortality is what helps us to become what our Heavenly Father wants us to become. But I've never relished adversity, I've never prayed for a trial to gain humility. Maybe I'm just scared, but I take comfort from Alma's teaching that it is not necessary to be compelled to be humble. I pray that I may truly "humble [myself] because of the word." I hope this way to become humble without losing my enthusiasm. I want to be able to sing and shout, as the hymn says, and really SHOUT, not mumble as if it was a funeral procession, but sing with gusto the anthems of the Restoration.

But back to the original theme of my post. I have made choices throughout my life, a few of which I regret, and some of which I often wonder what would have happened had I chosen a different path. As I contemplate my life, however, I realize that "I'm who I am today because I knew the you" (you referring to both people and experiences in my life). I wouldn't trade the people I know for those I don't. I wouldn't trade the experiences I have had for those that I haven't. I wonder, what if I had chosen the other path? Yes, it would have made all the difference, I would have met different people, I would have known different things, and chances are I would have developed slighlty differently, but no matter. My choices detemine my circumstances, but my attitude determines if those differences be for the better or worse. I have my eye on Eternal Life. Thus, who I become would not change no matter where I lived or whom I met.

FYI (for you, losy)

This is a picture drawn by Arnold Friberg. Notice that although Mormon is quite old, his arm is as big around as his head. If you could see his legs, they would no doubt be about the size of a regular man's chest. All of Arnold Friberg's pitures are like this. P.S. Where are the big words?